Knowing, Remembering, and Accepting
by halfshelledhero
Summary: Usagi Miyamoto knew he was alone in the world, and he accepted this as fact. That is, until he saved a turtle who didn't remember who he was. 2k14 verse
1. Chapter 1

_1\. I Know what I am. I just choose to ignore it._

Usagi Miyamoto didn't know what he was.

Well, that's a lie.

He just pretended not to know.

He knew he was a short-haired, white rabbit. A rabbit with big almond shape eyes. A bipedal rabbit that stood around five foot and four inches who weighed around a hundred and forty-five pounds, give or take. An intelligent rabbit who could form words, think critically, and use tools like a human. A rabbit who could speak and write in both Japanese and English. A rabbit who was surprisingly good at using the katana. He really did know what he was, if he was honest with himself.

Usagi knew that he didn't belong in this world. He wasn't natural. He knew this.

He was a freak.

A monster.

Sometimes, however, Usagi would just pretend he was normal.

There were days where Usagi was far from large, bustling cities, and quiet small towns filled with humans, and he was just by himself.

Usagi would pretend that he didn't know he was a monster.

But then, Usagi would need to get gas for his van. He would need to get data cards for his phone that got shit reception. He would need to restock on supplies. He would need to get car parts. He would need to figure out new ways to earn cash instead of just stealing on what he needed. And Usagi would find himself spending a few weeks or even a few months in one place filled with humans. And he would remember. Usagi would remember he does know what he was.

Usagi had made a few friends over the years. Human friends of course. He was alone, after all. There was no one else like him.

Generous friends that wire him money. Friends who would offer a bed for the night when he came and visit. Kind friends that almost made Usagi forget what he really was.

And really, any human was Usagi's friend if they kept his existence a secret.

Usagi knew he was alone, that he was the only one of his kind.

Usagi was his own breed of freak, and if he was honest with himself, it hurt like hell to know he was alone.

So, Usagi didn't know what he was.

He was _normal_.


	2. Chapter 2

_2\. My Dumpster Companion_

Usagi through more trash onto the fire. Over the flames, was an old pot filled with water, chicken broth, and a few questionable looking vegetables. Usagi didn't have time to scavenge around for fresher, healthier ones. Not tonight.

Usagi looked to the massive sleeping form next him.

A few hours earlier, when the sun was just setting, Usagi found himself in a dump looking for more thread. He had just recently ripped a hole through his favorite hoodie—he had only two—and while had enough thread to patch it up, Usagi knew what little he had left wasn't going to last.

Surprisingly, Usagi had good luck on his side. He didn't just find thread, but an entire sewing kit that was barely used. There were different colored threads, buttons—with matching pairs—different sized needles, two different sized scissors, a pin cushion, a new tape measure that he desperately needed, and the container was in top notch condition. Usagi was going to leave after he found what he was looking for, or if he didn't find it at all within an hour, but he decided to scavenge some more.

Usagi had spent three weeks in Las Vegas with a Japanese man by the name of Gennosuke. Gennosuke had taught Usagi many things during Usagi's time with him, and one of the things he taught Usagi was when you're winning at one slot machine, you don't leave to find the jackpot.

Gennosuke was also a gambling addict, and nearly sold Usagi out to the wrong people to pay off his debts, but he didn't, and Usagi still took his wayward friend's advice at heart.

So Usagi stayed at the dump, and found very little else he could use.

Usagi was just about to leave when he heard something stumble into the nearly secluded dump. Running on his natural instincts, Usagi buried himself into the trash and grime to avoid being seen, with of course, his newly acquired treasure.

Usagi's ears twitched. He could hear every step the stranger—a homeless person most likely—made. He heard the shuffling of garbage falling. He heard the sound of a person falling on said garbage. He heard a loud grunt. He heard shallow, pained breaths.

And over the smell of the dump, Usagi could smell fresh blood.

Whoever it was, the person was hurt, and Usagi had to help.

Or whoever it was a murderer and their victim, and Usagi would be killed.

Usagi had his sword with him, and he found out the hard way he was quicker than a trigger happy humans.

Usagi didn't fully leave his makeshift burrow when he decided to squirm his way out. He had the advantage of being on one of the tallest trash piles in the dump, and he was awarded with a decent view of the entire place.

And Usagi quickly spotted who had unknowingly joined him in the dump.

Lay face up was a man who had painted his skin green.

Hopping down with his new sewing kit, Usagi landed quite gracefully next to the odd looking human. He bent down to examine how injured the man was. There was so blood on his head, which couldn't mean anything good. He was covered in what will be some nasty bruises

The human was huge, to say the least. If Usagi had to guess, the man was well over six foot. How much he weighed, Usagi couldn't guess, but he looked heavy. Usagi had noticed, now that he was closer, that the man's skin wasn't just painted green, there seemed to be texture to it. The man, oddly enough, had three fingers. The other two weren't cut off, it just seemed as that he didn't grow them. He had armor on his chest and abdomen, but it interestedly enough, it looked the armor was attached directly on to his chest. And Usagi had noticed that the man wasn't lying completely on his back, most likely due to the bulky, shell-like backpack. The man's face was also different from other humans…

"You're not human." Usagi breathed out.

Slowly, the turtle—yes turtle, Usagi couldn't believe this—opened his eyes. His crystal clear blue eyes.

The turtle's eyes widen slightly at the site of Usagi, but he didn't seem as stunned as Usagi was to see him.

"You're not either."

The turtle started to drift off.

Usagi knew enough to know sleeping with a head injury wasn't good. In mad panic, Usagi tore off his hoodie—the hoodie he just fixed—and started wipe away at the blood on the turtle's head to get better look.

It was a small cut. It didn't even need stitches.

"You can't close your eyes. You got to keep them open, okay? You need to keep them open."

The turtle's eyes opened again.

Usagi dragged the turtle's head and some of his chest onto his lap. In the gentlest voice Usagi could muster, he asked "what's your name, turtle?"

The turtle smiled slightly up at the rabbit, "Leonardo." His voice was week, tired.

He was dying. "Yours?"

"Usagi."

Leonardo's smile grew.

"You're a rabbit."

Leonardo closed his eyes again.


	3. Chapter 3

_3\. I'm not wanted._

On the first day, Leonardo slept.

Usagi found an unused parking garage near the dump where he could mend Leonardo's wounds. Usagi, quite foolishly, left his van several blocks away and Leonardo proved to be much heavier than Usagi first thought. Usagi tried to hide Leonardo under a staircase on the third floor as best he could before he left to retrieve his van, but Usagi feared it might not be good enough. There were bound to be homeless humans living in the garage.

Usagi had only left Leonardo's side once Usagi knew his new companion wasn't going to slip into a coma, and die from the possible head trauma. Well, actually Usagi didn't know if Leonardo would or would not die from possible head trauma. His untrustworthy friend Gennosuke didn't teach him that in Vegas. Usagi know that while the small cut on Leonardo's head wasn't even bad enough to leave a scar, the nasty bruise the side of his head could prove to be a danger.

He also needed food for the turtle. Judging by the size, and weight, of Leonardo, Usagi didn't have enough for the both of them. And Usagi didn't know what foods turtles could and could have.

The second day, Leonardo woke up for five minutes.

Usagi was fairly happy and he hoped that his excitement didn't scare off his new friend…his _potentially_ new friend.

"You're awake!"

Usagi found it hard to keep his excitement.

Leonardo, who was slowly moving to set up, was startled into jumping straight up, hitting his head on the hard cement above them. Usagi was quick to catch the heavy turtle, apologizing the whole time.

"I'msorrry.I'msorrry.I'msooosorrry. I am so damn sorry. Oh god, you're not hurt are? I'm sorry. Lie back down."

All the while, Leonardo was muttering, "it's fine. It's okay. I'm fine. My head hurts."

"Are you sure? Do you need me to get anything? I'm sorry. Are you hungry? I'm sorry. Let me get you some soup."

Usagi moved to get up and get the left over soup out of the mini fridge in the van, but was stopped by Leonardo grabbing Usagi's wrist. It shocked the rabbit that even injured the turtle had so much power in his grip and his movements were quick.

"It's fine," his eyes moved around, "where are we?"

"An old parking garage near a random dump…are you sure you don't need anything, Leonardo?"

The turtle's eyes widen at the sound of his name. In a quiet and soft voice, "what did you just call me?"

"Leonardo…that is your name? You told me it was before you passed out. Did you need any water?"

"My name…?" Leonardo sounded confused, but he looked concerned.

Usagi was concerned too. "You don't remember your name." It was a statement.

"…no…" Usagi could see the growing panic and terror in Leonardo's eyes. "No, I don't…I…do I know you?" His voice was weak that it was a strain for even Usagi to hear.

On the third day, Leonardo was awake for three hours.

He still didn't remember anthing.

Usagi had to help the massive turtle on to his feet so he could pee. It was embarrassing for the both of them, but Usagi couldn't sit back and watch Leonardo struggle to standup.

On the third day, Usagi learned that Leonardo was a very prideful induvial and hated to being taken care of.

On the third day, Leonardo learned several things about _his_ new friend: First, his name was Usagi Miyamoto, and second, Usagi was just as stubborn as Leonardo was proud.

On the fourth day, Leonardo's head still throbbed, but he was awake for seven hours.

"Do you have any memories at all?" Usagi asked.

Leonardo shook his head, "no…I mean…I remember being angry. Like I had an argument. A heated argument with someone, and then being attacked. But nothing else."

An argument? Then being attacked?"

"Usagi, do you think they're related? The argument and me being attacked?" Leonardo gave Usagi a curious look.

Usagi could only guess. "I don't know, Leonardo. As of right now, I can only guess, but I would lean more towards yes."

Leonardo nodded, then put his head in his hands and moaned. Moving his head still hurt.

Usagi hoped that didn't mean his friend was suffering from a blood clot.

On the fifth day, Leonardo was making a wonderful recovery. His head didn't hurt at all. His body was stiff, but that was mainly due to the fact he was sleeping in a small space.

Usagi had a portable TV with a dvd player attached to it. There was an outlet right under the staircase, meaning he didn't have to use up the van's gas. They spent the better of the fifth day watching movies.

On the sixth day, humans started using the bottom part of the garage. They all seemed to be part of a local gang called the Purple Dragons.

Usagi was nervous. Not for himself, of course. He could take care of himself, no problem. He was nervous for Leonardo. Usagi assumed that Leonardo could fight. Leonardo had two katanas, and several pouches on his person filled with smoke bombs, and ninja stars and knives. There was also the fact Leonardo looked like he could rip a car in two if he wanted. But despite that Leonardo seemed fine, Usagi knew that he was still recovering from serious head trauma.

A fight with a few street punks was not something Leonardo needed.

Leonardo, on the other hand, was terrified. Leonardo knew the Purple Dragons; he was sure of it. It hurt his head to think too long on how he knew them, but he did. He wanted to leave that night, but Usagi pointed out it was too risky and they should at least wait it out a couple days.

Leonardo agreed with little protest.

On the seventh day, Leonardo realized that he should have protested.

Usagi regretted talking Leonardo into staying. They should have left.

There were more Purple Dragons than they were yesterday. To Usagi, they were celebrating something. The what, he didn't know. He didn't want to know.

Leonardo was on a verge of a panic attack when he heard a couple of humans coming up the stairs.

When the two humans, a woman and a man, walked right over the two mutants, Usagi decided to fuck it and leave right then and there.

Leonardo squeezed himself in the back hiding, while Usagi wore his remaining hoodie and a pair of sunglasses, hoping the humans just thought he was one of them.

On the seventh night, after filling up the tank and the two gas cans, and restocking on food and water, Usagi and Leonardo made their way out of New York.

Usagi gave Leonardo, who was now sitting in the front seat, a side way glance.

"Are sure you want to leave? If we stay, you could get your memories back."

Leonardo thought about it, and he thought about the words he remembered before he met Usagi.

"… _Stop trying to be him! You can't replace our father..."_

"… _I wished it was you…"_

"… _I hate you…"_

Those last words were from him, he knew. He had a what? Sister? Brother? _Brothers_? He had some sort of sibling in this city, if those words meant anything. But it hurts his head to think about the words and context surrounding the words, so Leonardo let the words dropped. They didn't mean anything. Not now. There's nothing left for him here.

"No, I…I don't want to be here anymore."

 _I'm not wanted anymore._

The words were on the tip of Leonardo's tongue, but he pushed them aside.

"I wouldn't mind travelling with you…that is if you don't mind."

Leonardo turned to look at Usagi. The rabbit's fur was a pure white, illuminating the darkness. His head was not as round from this angle, it was sharper and longer. Usagi's eyes were entirely black, but Leonardo could still see the city lights reflect in them. Usagi looked back at Leonardo for a split second, only to turn away again. The rabbit's ears and nose twitched before he smiled.

"I'd would love to have you as my travelling companion, Leonardo."

Leonardo returned the smile and faced the road.


	4. Chapter 4

_4\. We're the same. Really._

During their first month living together, Usagi had expected that he would make adjustments. But gratefully, Usagi didn't make many.

Sleeping arrangements was an issue at first. While the van's fold out bed was big enough for them to have room to move, Leonardo was too tall. He had to scrunch his legs close. He always woke up cramped up, but he didn't complain.

Usagi found that Leonardo didn't complain much. At all really.

They didn't argue either.

They practically agreed on almost everything. Usagi had seventeen different movies ranging from The Lord of the Rings trilogy—he had yet to be able to collect the Hobbit—to several classic noir films. Leonardo like them just fine, but he seemed rather attached to the five movies that seemed rather out of place in Usagi's small collection: two Batman films, the first _Men in Black_ , the second Star Trek film, and the first Fast and Furious.

By the end of their month together, Usagi's collection went from seventeen to their thirty-five. Leonardo said it wasn't necessary to get movies that he liked.

Leonardo also liked to read, and he was fast a reader. Usagi had only ten books. Five mystery novels, two books about Japan and Japanese culture—both on ancient and modern, _The Art of War_ , one Stephen King novel that Usagi never finished—not because he was afraid of course, and a very beaten up _Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire_. Leonardo had went through most of the collection at a surprising rate.

By the end of their first month together, Usagi knew he had to get more books for Leonardo. Leonardo protested.

The difference that Usagi truly noticed, or cared about, was their taste in music. It wasn't that Leonardo didn't have a fondness for classic rock, because he did. Truly. It's just that he had a greater fondness for decade old pop music, and rap. Usagi didn't. In fact, he found Leonardo's taste in music questionable at best.

By the end of their first month, they both agreed to disagree on what's good music. Though, Usagi noticed that Leonardo would turn the radio off if the only thing they could get was a Hip-Hop station. Usagi would turn it back on, of course.

Closer to the end of their first month together, Usagi wondered if Leonardo still held the knowledge to use his katanas.

"I don't know. I mean, I somehow know all the words to "Hollaback Girl" when it started playing. This might be the same thing…maybe?" Leonardo gave a small shrug, "If not, you could always teach me how to use at least one of them."

By the end of their first month, Usagi had gained a training partner. A training partner who constantly belittled his own skills in favor of Usagi's

"Does it bother you?" Leonardo once asked.

They had left New York City five weeks ago, and were camping outside a small Pennsylvania town. It was a spring, which meant the nights were just warm enough for Leonardo, but cool enough for Usagi. They sat around a fire watching the last of the poor squirrels Leonardo had caught cook.

"Does what bother me?" Usagi had went scavenging for wild berries and nuts earlier in the day when Leonardo had decided to go hunting for meat. Apparently some turtles craved meat, and Leonardo couldn't just live on the all vegetarian diet that Usagi was used too.

He had gestured towards the squirrel.

Usagi furrowed his brow. What an odd questioned. When Leonardo had told Usagi he needed to eat protein from meat, Usagi fully accepted it. Leonardo even asked if it bothered him several hours ago. Why was he asking again?

Usagi turned to look at his friend. Leonardo's brow was creased with stress lines, his shoulders were tensed and ridged, and, glancing down, Usagi could see the turtle balled up fists were tearing at the grass. Usagi wished he could ask why the younger mutant was so filled with self-doubt and worry that he believed eating small animals would make Usagi turn Leonardo away, but Leonardo wouldn't be able to answer.

"Leonardo, look at me."

Leonardo refused to do so.

Usagi sighed. He closed his eyes for a brief moment before adjusting himself to sit on his legs, and facing his friend. Cupping Leonardo's face, Usagi forced the turtle to look at him. He was met with little resistance.

"Leonardo, if that was a wild rabbit you had caught," Usagi pointed towards the slowly burning squirrel, "I wouldn't care. I need to eat plants. You need to eat meat. I don't care, just as long you are healthy and happy. And if I didn't, you still don't need my approval. I will not hinder your survival. You shouldn't let your appeasing nature to do so either.

"You wouldn't be bothered if I ate a rabbit?" Leonardo's tone was flat, as if he didn't believe Usagi.

Usagi dropped his hands and shrugged. "I would rather you didn't, but no. Leonardo, this isn't about you eating game meat in front of me."

Leonardo stayed silent. When Usagi first saw Leonardo's eyes, he thought they were an incredibly bright blue. Orchids in the middle of an open field. Now, Usagi saw that wasn't the case. They clouded over, dull tittering on the edge of gray. How did he not notice?

"No," Usagi answered firmly. "This is about you not wanting anything for yourself. You thinking and acting at any moment I will kick you out of my van and stranded you in the middle of the nowhere because you want or need something," he now gestured to the burnt squirrel. "It's about you putting yourself down. I don't know if this was what you were like before we met, before you lost your memories, but you can't do this to yourself. I'm not going to let you continue on like this, Leonardo."

By the start of their second month together, Usagi was happy see the subtle differences.

* * *

AN: Hey guys. I just wanted to say thanks to The Over9000NinjaAlchemist, Insanity21, my anon Guest, and deedee for their reviews. And also to all those who are following along. I appreciate it. :)


	5. Chapter 5

_1._ _Of Wolves and Rabbits_

It was three months since Usagi found Leonardo in the dumpster. It was summer now, and the heat was getting to Usagi. He didn't mention this to Leonardo, because Usagi knew the turtle would demand they head into a colder climate if Usagi did. Leonardo was enjoying his time out in the Sun; Usagi could suffer the heat to see Leonardo happy.

Usagi was lounging on the van's bed, in attempt to stay cool, while Leonardo laid sprawled out on the grass Sun bathing. He had a fairly content look on his face. Usagi didn't bother believing his friend was asleep. He had learned that even if Leonardo was asleep, then he was still awake.

Usagi normally would wear dark blues and blacks, but today he opted to wear a thin and baggy red pair of shorts with nothing else. He envied the turtle. The plastron acted more like another second layer of hard skin on Leonardo's chest, than a shell. So it was surprising that it still acted like any normal turtles' would when it came to the…private region. Usagi was grateful for that. He was all for Leonardo's happiness and comfort—heaven knows Leonardo wasn't—but Usagi would find it…distracting if Leonardo's anatomy resembled closer to human's.

Usagi was pushing himself to finish the Stephen King novel now that they had secured two more for Leonardo, but the grotesque imagery was starting to get him. Again. So he put it down and took a large gulp of water.

The second he did, Usagi's rather small bladder starting to scream at him.

Stumbling out of the van and into the blazing sun, Usagi made his way to a nearby cluster of trees.

Slipping into the privacy the cluster gave him, Usagi spotted a small brown rabbit nibbling on grass.

It didn't even bother to flee from him. Usagi gave it a lop-sided grin. "You should flee now, before my friend decides he wants to eat again."

It turned to look at Usagi, only to ignore him again.

Usagi dropped his shorts and to relieve his bladder.

The rabbit took off in mad panic.

"Odd…"

And then that _smell_ hit him.

A smell he was all too familiar with.

Usagi turned, not caring where his piss landed.

He stopped caring about anything when saw a wolf a few yards away.

It was low to the ground, inching its way across the floor.

The rational side of Usagi spotted how thin the wolf was. How mangy it was. How small it was. That Usagi was physically capable on killing the wolf even without his sword. That this wolf wasn't a threat to Usagi, and he needed to _calm_ down. _Right now. Calm down. The wolf can smell your fear, Usagi. You need to calm down. Calm down, Usagi. Breathe, Usagi. You need to breathe! Stop panicking, Usagi!_

But that was drowned out by the simple command:

 _RUN!_

The rabbit bolted out of the cluster into an open field. His goal was the small forest that laid straight ahead.

The rabbit was on all fours, his mind running on pure instinct.

The rabbit didn't hear his name being called. He didn't hear the sound of metal going through bone. He didn't hear a distinct yelp.

The rabbit fled deeper into the woods. Jumping over large branches, diving under fallen trees.

He slowed when the sense of being chased stopped.

The rabbit leaned against a massive tree, and slid down to the ground.

He could feel the bark scraping at his scarred skin, threatening to reopen old wounds

 _No._

He could feel the smooth, cool touch of metal pressed against his back.

The quiet forest was replaced by a roaring crowd of humans, men and women alike. Another sound could be heard mixed into the masses. The sound of two enraged dogs barking and snarling at anything or _anyone_.

And the bunny was in a small kennel, kept himself far from the door as possible. But it didn't matter. The second the lock unhatched he would be thrown into the ring, to further provoke the two dogs into a frenzy.

The bunny's nose twitch as a giant shadow loomed over the kennel, blocking the dull yellow light from above. The familiar sound of a click was made. The kennel was tipped, and before he could grab on to anything, he fell on to the dirt floor.

The bunny looked around for a means of an escape. A solid wall of humans circled around him.

The bunny could hear someone shout, _"rip that freak's fuckin throat out!"_

The bunny didn't bother to look at the dogs. He just curled into a ball, making himself as small as possible and—

"Usagi?"

At the sound of his name, Usagi was brought back to present.

* * *

AN: The next chapter is going to cover Usagi's backstory in this universe...It's not pretty. Some of the themes are dark, if you haven't gotten that from this chapter. Anyway, I just wanted to warn you guys in advance.

I will probably post next early next week.


	6. Chapter 6

_6\. Do you want to talk about it?_

Usagi jolted awake. He moved to sit up, but he felt an arm around his chest, keeping him in place. Panic welled inside he chest, until he remembered that it was Leonardo's. Usagi forced himself to relaxed.

 _Leonardo isn't going to hurt you._

He was on his side, curled in a ball. Leonardo, in his sleep, had wrapped himself around the rabbit. Leonardo's face was pressed into the back of Usagi's head.

 _He's not going to hurt you._

Usagi's ears twitched at the sound of rain hitting the roof of his van. Normally they would camp outside, even if it was sprinkling, but the rain was coming down hard. The tiny tent they normally used would be constantly leaking if it was used now.

"Usagi?"

To a human, it would be a whisper. But Leonardo was so close to his sensitive ears, that Usagi flinched. "Yes?"

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Talk about what? The weather?

"I saw on my phone earlier today that it will storm tomorrow night. We should find a small motel."

"Yeah?"

Usagi shifted onto his back, staring up at the ceiling. He felt Leonardo move too; he propped his head with his free hand, the other was still on Usagi's chest.

Usagi answered, "it won't be safe for us being in the van if we get caught by a storm in the middle of nowhere. We also need gas."

"Okay."

Leonardo laid his head down on top of Usagi's chest. Usagi moved his arm accommodate the turtle, and began rubbing the top part of Leonardo's shell. Leonardo ran his fingers through Usagi's fur. The action was comforting in a way, but it also made Usagi feel violated. He wanted Leonardo to stop, but it felt wonderful too.

 _He's not going to hurt you._

"Do you want to talk about what it?" Leonardo asked again.

"It feels nice. What you're doing." _Please, stop. It hurts._

Leonardo lifted his head, Usagi could barely make out the features of Leonardo's face, but he could imagine the concern expression. "You don't like it? Do you want me to stop?"

"How did you get that from 'it feels nice'?" Usagi was harsher than he should have been. He didn't care. Leonardo had already removed his hand.

"Usagi, what happened today?"

Usagi grabbed Leonardo's hand, and put back on his chest.

"Nothing happened today. Nothing that I want to talk about."

"Okay." Leonardo laid his head back down, and began combing his fingers through Usagi's soft fur again.

It was silent inside the van for long time after that. The rain started to let up, and the moon started to break through the clouds.

 _He's not going to hurt you._

"Leonardo?"

The turtle let out a soft hum.

"Do you know why I insist on travelling from one place to another, never staying in one spot for too long?"

"I don't think you ever told me."

 _He's not going to hurt you._

"I used to live in Japan. I was born there. I think. A man named Katsuichi took me in. He adopted me without hesitation, and when I was wolf enough, he became my sensei and taught me how to use a sword. I was a curious child, and I constantly asked where I came from. He told me I came from spirits that live in the woods. When I was twelve, he finally told me the truth." Usagi stopped for a moment. It hurt thinking about the truth, "he came across me in a trash can when I was a baby," for a second Leonardo gripped Usagi's fur hard. Usagi continued, "when I was six, I wondered off his estate. Like I said, I was curious, and I wanted to explore. My sensei had…enemies. I don't think I will ever find out why Katsuichi had these enemies. He never told me. And it doesn't matter. It wouldn't change what they did…" Usagi trailed off.

"Usagi, you don't have to tell me."

Usagi closed his eyes tightly, and let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. "I know. I know. And I don't want to, but…I need to. I just…anyway, there are two men I remember. Hikiji and…Jei. Hikiji had been a crime boss of a well-organized gang. Some sort of off shoot of the Yakuza, much like the Foot Clan is."

"The what?" Leonardo tensed, which made sense to Usagi. If Leonardo had lived his entire life in New York, he might have some vague memories of the Foot.

"I'll tell you later," he heard a muffled 'okay', "Hikiji had men stationed outside my sensei's estate; they found me the night I wondered off. Hikiji saw that having me, he would make a profit. Jei saw me as a demon. They both agreed, however, that I was best used in America far from my sensei." Usagi remembered the small, metal cage that he lived in for days. How it would rock back and forth, at one-point flipping on its side. The memory made his breaths short and haggard, "I was used as bait in dog fights."

At that Leonardo lowered his hand to Usagi's side and felt for the three, old, jagged scars, "I wasn't going to ask about them..." He trailed off.

Usagi was grateful that Leonardo didn't ask. There weren't any on his face. Surprisingly, there weren't many on his arms and stomach. The few he did have were so faded and small, his fur covered them. But his back was another story. Claw marks covered more of his back than his fur. His legs weren't spared either, but those scars weren't made by dogs.

On his left inner thigh was a thin line made by a knife.

"Some of them aren't just from the dog fights. I was used…I was a …" Usagi's voice cracked. His breathing grew erratic.

"Take your time." Leonardo's voice was so soothing. The circler motions he made through Usagi's fur made the rabbit relax. Usagi forced his breathing into a steady rhythm.

 _He won't hurt you._

Usagi took a deep breath and continued. "When I was seven, after a particularly nasty dog fight, I was injured pretty badly. It took months for me to completely recover. Jei…went to Hikiji about the idea of using me…for other things. He thought I was an evil spirit who needed to be punished, and the dog fights were going to kill me. He didn't want that, so…I was…" Usagi's mouth was starting to become dry at the thought on telling Leonardo what else "Please, don't ask me what else happened." Usagi resisted the urge to cringe. He was begging; he hated himself for it.

"I won't."

Usagi continued, "Hikiji didn't care about Jei's fanatical beliefs, but he didn't want me to die either. He would lose a profit. So he agreed…and I was held captive for two more years, when my sensei finally came and rescued me. He killed Hijiki and his gang, except for one. One man survived that night."

"Jei."

Usagi nodded, "Jei survived."

"What happen to Katsuichi?"

"Katsuichi didn't have the money to take us back to Japan, so we stayed here, in America. We moved constantly for four years. Eventually, we made our way to Texas where a good friend of Katsuichi's from Japan had moved to. He had a wife and daughter, and he agreed to house us both. Mariko, his daughter, was my age. She and I were…close. We only planned to live with the family for a month, but a month had turn into two months, then five, and then nine, and finally a year went by. We stayed with them for two years." Usagi took another long breath, "Jei found us when I was fifteen. He killed…Katsuichi, while I escaped with Mariko, and her parents. I realized I couldn't stay in one place."

There was a beat of silence after Usagi was done with his story. Leonardo continued on running his fingers through Usagi's fur, and to make sure he didn't stop, Usagi held onto his arm.

"Usagi…I don't know what to say."

Usagi muttered in a tired voice, "please, don't say anything."

And Leonardo didn't.

* * *

AN: Once again, I have to thank everyone who is reading, following, and reviewing. 


	7. Chapter 7

_7\. And What Do We Call Us?_

The first five days after running into the wolf, Leonardo hovered over Usagi, and Usagi let him. Those five days were a blur of memories that Usagi had thought were buried.

And Leonardo's constant presence was soothing.

It was three weeks after the incident, and Usagi found himself thinking about what their relationship was turning into. It was hard not to, really. Since that night, Leonardo had wrapped his arms around Usagi. The summer heat was stifling for Usagi. His fur was short, but also thick. He opted out of sleeping in clothes.

So here they were, stuck in a closed in space, both completely naked, and Leonardo was spooning Usagi.

They were friends. Usagi knew that much, but he felt they were more than that. They had to be; they were so intimate for two people known eachother for such a short amount of time. And it had been a short amount of time. Roughly six months. Usagi had to also remind himself that he was the only person Leonardo knew.

But yet…Usagi knew they were undoubtedly close. Or at least, Usagi believe they were close. Usagi had _friends_ around America. All humans of course. Typically, how he made these friends was he wondered into town, saw someone in danger, save that person's life, and some would be so grateful, they would over look his abnormal appearance, and they promised to keep his exigence a secret.

But those people he had saved, that didn't flee from him, were friends in a loose sense of the word.

Mariko and Gennosuke were the only true friends Usagi had, other than Leonardo of course.

Indecently, they were the only two people Usagi was romantically involved with. Usagi couldn't honestly compare Mariko to Gennosuke, and he certainly couldn't care the both of them to Leonardo.

Mariko was his first, well everything. First kiss. First date. First dance—she had refused to go to her semi formal in favor in spending the night with him of all people. And they had been each other's first time.

When Usagi and her had to separate when they were fifteen, Usagi swore they would never see each other again. They stayed contact over the years, but he had only visited her once when he was twenty-one.

Then there was Gennosuke.

Gen was Mariko's opposite. He was strong, tall, and physically opposing. She was 4'11 . Gen was a total bastard, and Usagi barely trusted him. Mariko was the sweetest person Usagi ever met. Whereas Mariko was Usagi's age, Gen was in his seven years older. Had much more life experience than Mariko.

Usagi had no memories of his and Gen's first time. He was nineteen when he met Gen in Vegas, and Usagi never had alcohol before. Usagi wasn't sure how, but he ended up in Gen's bed.

Their second time was a whole different story. Usagi had remembered every detail of that night. Gen had moved to Chicago, and asked Usagi if he wanted to stay a month. Usagi agreed. He had never been to Chicago, and it was three years since Las Vegas. It happened that first night in Chicago, and it was a stark contrast to sex with Mariko.

Gen, in his usual crude manner, had described it as the most _animalistic fuck_ he ever had. Usagi didn't agree with the term himself, but he could see why it was an apt description for that night.

Nothing came from it. Usagi stayed with Gen for a few weeks as planned, then left. They're friendship never changed, and they never talked about it.

With one exception.

Gen had asked about the scars on Usagi's back. The only time Gen had seen Usagi's back, and could remember, was Usagi's first night in Chicago. That was the closest they ever came to talking about that night, and Gen wanted to know about the scars.

"You're thinking too loud," Leonardo said. His voice was low from grogginess.

Usagi stiffened at the sound of Leonardo's voice.

Adjusting himself, Usagi turned to face the turtle. He could barely make out the details of Leonardo's face.

Usagi ran a hand over Leonardo's plastron. It was rough, both from natural textures and scars.

"Did I wake you by thinking?"

There was brief pause, and then in a tired, and almost annoyed voice, "your ears twitch when you are focusing on something. They were bumping against my head."

"Sorry, I won't think from now on."

Leonardo hummed, "at least not until morning."

Usagi didn't reply. His hand drifted from Leonardo's chest to Leonardo's face. He felt for the edge of Leonardo's mouth, "Usagi, what are you—

Usagi pulled Leonardo in for a quick kiss, only to pull away. He could barely make out the details of Leonardo's face, even this close by, it was clear that Leonardo was confused and shocked. His eyes were wide, and fully awake.

"Did…did you just kiss me?"

Usagi shrugged, "I think I did."

"You think?"

"I am not sure barely touching lips counts as a real kiss."

Leonardo did not respond right away, and for a brief second Usagi thought he made a mistake in kissing the turtle.

"Leonardo, I—

"Could you," Leonardo cut Usagi off, "show me what counts as a 'real kiss'?" His voice was nervous, but almost hopeful. Usagi's face broke into a grin, and he pulled Leonardo in close once more.


	8. Chapter 8

_8\. Swimming in Lake Erie ( Or in which Leonardo is a dick )_

"What did I tell you about getting my ears?"

Leonardo's only response was mischievous smirk, before diving back into the cool waters of Lake Erie.

Summer was coming to an end, and Leonardo wanted to swim. Usagi readily agreed; he wasn't the strongest of swimmers and needed an inflated tube to keep afloat, but he did enjoy swimming. And of course, Leonardo had no memories of swimming. So as far they knew, Leonardo didn't even know how to swim. It turned out, however, that Leonardo was an excellent swimmer.

Of course, they couldn't swim in the day, which meant they had to swim when the lake was too cold to appreciate, but that didn't stop Leonardo from enjoying himself. And apparently, Leonardo enjoying himself meant annoying the hell out of Usagi.

"If I get an ear infection, you will be barred from sleeping in the van!" Usagi shouted into the dark water. He heard nothing. His ears, pulled together to make a ponytail drooped with irritation. "If you grab my feet again…"

Nothing.

Briefly, the rabbit felt concern that maybe he—

No. Usagi knew that the turtle didn't drown.

He was quite sure of it.

The turtle in question was probably going to sneak—

"This is nice."

Usagi let out shriek.

Swirling the tube around in an attempt to his Leonardo, Usagi hit the water instead. Between the momentum of Usagi spinning, and him pushing the water, propelled the rabbit further into the lake.

Leonardo would be doubled over with laughter if it weren't for the fact the water was chest high to him.

"'This is nice'", Usagi muttered as he paddled himself back to Leonardo. "It's nice if you aren't being terrorized by Godzilla's fucking bastard son," Usagi spat out. He glared up at the turtle who stood before him.

"Oh boy, maybe I _should_ stop," Leonardo's tone was somehow mocking, but also flat. "I heard you only swear once since I've known you. You must be pissed." Leonardo's grin did not falter at the angry look Usagi gave him. In fact, it grew.

Usagi's glare darken.

And Leonardo's smile twisted into a devious smirk. A smirk that said, ' _this is payback_ ', and ' _you only have yourself to blame_ '.

And then, suddenly, Usagi knew what was happening. Retaliation.

Had he not just last week spent hours pissing off Leonardo by being an annoying prick himself? Usagi would talk in Japanese, knowing Leonardo could barely understand him. Usagi would throw acorns and pine-cones at the turtle's head, and then act as if he had no idea what Leonardo was complaining about. And at the end of the day, when Leonardo sat scowling at the fire, annoyed beyond belief, Usagi came up behind him and pulled Leonardo's head back and gave the frustrated turtle a short, upside down kiss.

And when Leonardo had come inside the van for bed, Usagi didn't talk about it.

Usagi suddenly regretted his behavior…mostly because he didn't expect his boyfriend to retaliate.

Usagi's glare melted, and in its place was a sheepish grin.


	9. Chapter 9

AN: Before we continue with this chapter, you might have noticed it's fairly long. I'm going to be taking a two week break from updating. When I come back to this story, I will be posting like have been before. Oh, and I know have been writing in this odd format so for in this fanfic, but with the introduction of more characters, that's probably going to stop for the most part.

* * *

 _9\. From July to October._

 **1\. Rent**

It was Usagi's suggestion that they see an outdoor musical.

Leonardo had pick their first date—a horror movie that they both enjoyed—so it was Usagi's turn.

Leonardo totally and utterly understood that.

Truly, he did. And he would be happy to do anything that Usagi wanted to do.

Except watch a community theater troupe put on "Rent".

The theater's lactation was in an outdoor stadium. It was surprisingly harder to sneak into than the indoor movie theaters they have been too, but Usagi was quite insistent on see the musical, and here Leonardo was watching a bunch of humans seeing and dancing on strange, while listening to his boyfriend trying to hide the fact he was crying.

They were both quite lucky that it was late into the evening, and it was slightly chilly outside. Big, baggy hoodies were expected. Unfortunately, the scarves and gloves that they were forced to wear, were excessive. Especially since they weren't in the Midwest anymore, they have moved down South. And just because fall was around the corner, did not mean much in this region. Even Leonardo, who normally enjoyed the heat, was feeling uncomfortable. He couldn't imagine how Usagi felt under all the layers of clothes he had to wear on top of his fur.

Usagi whimpered.

Or maybe he was so engrossed with the musical to even notice.

Leonardo turned to see Usagi huddled in his dark blue hoodie; his hands were gripping the edges of the scarf that covered his mouth.

Leonardo leaned in and whispered, "are you okay?"

Usagi turned, and Leonardo could see his large almond-shaped eyes were wet. "Of course I'm not. Don't be ridiculous."

Leonardo lifted a brow, "you're crying."

"A character just _died,"_ Usagi gestured toward the stage, "and no, I am not crying."

"What I don't get is, we have this movie, why are we watching it live?"

Usagi's eyes narrowed, and made an odd hissing noise before replying, "it is not the same thing."

Leonardo shrugged and went back to watch the show. He had to admit, most of the members of the cast were good.

 **2\. Pizza**

Usagi's idea of a romantic moonlit dinner was something he would see in movies: a fancy meal on expensive plates, candles, high-class wine, elegant music playing in the background, and over-the-top declarations of love. Something he would never experience.

What was _not_ his idea of a romantic moonlit dinner was two pizzas—one large meat lover's, the other a medium veggie's, a battery-run lantern, and a ridiculously cheesy action movie from the 80's.

They sat outside of the van, enjoying the autumn breeze.

Usagi took a sip of his Sprite, and gave Leonardo a sideways glance. He was happily munching down on his pizza, his focus seemly glued to the

Usagi scooted closer to Leonardo, and rested his head on Leonardo's shoulder. Leonardo did not hesitate on swinging an arm around Usagi's waste, and pulling Usagi closer to him.

Usagi decided that he didn't need the over-the-top decorations of love.

 **3\. Assumptions**

A stroll through a park seemed unnecessarily risky to Leonardo. He did not like being out in the open; it went against his nature, but the city they were in was small, and it was one o'clock in the morning.

And it wasn't like if they were spotted, they couldn't handle themselves. That and, most people would run the opposite direction from them, which Leonardo understood. Well, he understood why anyone would run away from him. He was a bulky, turtle-man who stood over six feet with two katana swords strapped to his back. He was scary. Usagi, on the other hand, was utterly adorable. From the way his nose twitches when he's curious, to how he hops when he's excited. His wide eyes, his cute little overbite, his emotive ears, and well, everything about Usagi was just adorable. How could anyone find Usagi scary was beyond Leonardo's comprehension. Usagi being so damn cute was probably why he was such a skilled swordsman; he had to compensate for his cuteness.

Not that Leonardo would voice his opinion. Usagi would be insulted, even if that wasn't Leonardo's intention.

"You've been quiet the whole time we've been here," Usagi muttered.

Leonardo bit his bottom lip, "I've been thinking what if someone spotted us."

"We can handle a few human thugs, Leonardo."

"I know, it's just I'm worried." He was worried about Usagi mostly. Leonardo knew Usagi was skilled. He didn't need to see Usagi to physically fight to know that the rabbit was skilled, sparring with Usagi was good enough. But Leonardo's mind would wonder a few months back when Usagi crossed paths with that wolf. Usagi had shut down completely, and what if they ran into something else that reminded Usagi of his past?

But again, Leonardo wasn't going to say all that.

"You worry far too much."

Leonardo stopped, forcing Usagi to stop between him and a massive tree. Leonardo smiled down at Usagi, "Probably." He leaned down, grabbed the sides of Usagi's face, and pulled Usagi in for a tentative kiss.

Before it could go any further, their kiss was interrupted by a scream.

Usagi jerked away, his ears popped out from under his hood, standing straight up, "It came from that direction." He gestured behind them, further into the park.

Before Leonardo could respond, Usagi had already dashed in that direction.

It took not even thirty seconds for both of them to find whom the scream belonged too. Hiding amongst the cluster of tall bushes, Leonardo could five men surrounding a man and a woman, who were both on the ground. One of the men had aimed a gun at the couple.

As Leonardo surveyed the scene, Usagi had already made the decision to intervene.

"I suggest you put your gun away, sir." His voice was polite, but there was a slight edge to it that Leonardo had never heard before. Leonardo had never _seen_ Usagi like this before. Yes, Usagi has been irritated, even mad, but he had never looked _dangerous_. It might have been years of training that Leonardo could not remember, but he saw the difference between the Usagi from minutes ago to the one who stood before him now. His eyes were narrowed into slits, his ears laid completely against his back, he gripped the hilt of his sword, and stood in stance that he was ready to leap at the men at a second notice. Usagi had the situation under control, and those humans had no idea.

In that moment, Leonardo had realized he made a grave mistake in assuming Usagi couldn't be scary. Usagi was downright terrifying when he needed to be.

The muggers thought nothing of Usagi. Instead of seeing the clear threat before them, they laughed, one of them barking out "Easter came early."

The man with the gun, most likely the leader, looked Usagi up, and down. His face broke into a condescending smirk, "look, kid, I know ya want to be a hero, but this don't involve ya." Usagi's nose twitched at the word 'kid'. The man drawled on, "I'll be kind, and let ya turn around, and pretend you didn't see any—

"I will not ask again," Usagi interrupted. "Put away your gun, or I will force you to put it away."

The man just shrugged, then without waring raised his gun.

Leonardo was already in front of Usagi before it went off.

 **4\. Arguments and Memories.**

 _"What the hell were you thinking!?"_

"I was thinking I didn't want you get shot!"

They were several streets away from the park, standing in a small alleyway. Usagi was seething, barely keeping a top on his bubbling anger. And the more Leonardo stood there, with his hands on his hips, pacing back and forth, trying to justify tonight's stupidity, the harder it was for Usagi to keep his cool. He closed his eyes and breathed out several long breaths. His hands, which have been balled into fists the whole time, unclutched When he opened them again, Usagi said in calm and even tone, "I had it under control."

Leonardo just got anger, and ignored Usagi's comment completely. "F—dammit, Usagi, nothing bad happened. No one was hurt, you took care of those guys, and now they hae to deal with the police. I don't get why you're so damn mad."

The calmness Usagi just forced upon himself evaporated. "I'm mad because you threw yourself in front of a gun!"

"I'm bulletproof," Leonardo exclaimed!

"Did you know that when you jumped in front of me?" Usagi snapped, pointing at him.

"No, but—

"But nothing! You didn't know, and you could have died! What if you got hit, Leonardo?"

"What about you!?" Leonardo shot back, pointing right back at the rabbit. "You jumped out there without even thinking!"

"You're kidding me, right?" Usagi asked in a flat, quiet voice, "you honestly thought I jumped out there without any sort of plan?" His voice grew louder with every word "For nearly eleven years I have lived on my own, I saved people on my own, I know what I'm doing, Leonardo! I don't need you to jump, and risk your life!"

"It's my job, Raphael!"

The second those oh-so-familiar words fell out of his mouth, the second he said that _name,_ Leonardo clamped his mouth shut.

A memory resurfaced, forcing its way to the front of Leonardo's mind.

He was younger, much younger than he was now. And in the memory, before him was a turtle, larger and bulkier than he was. It was his brother. Who was reckless, rebellious even, who didn't think before jumping in a fight, who didn't listen to Leonardo.

Leonardo leaned against one of the buildings, slid against the wall, gripping his head. The anger and frustration toward Usagi left him as more vague memories of his past assaulted him.

Usagi stood there, wide eyed, and slacked jawed. He didn't know what to think at Leonardo's outburst. He walked over to Leonardo, and sat next to the turtle. Usagi pulled his legs close to his body, and began to fidget with his hands.

"Leonardo, I'm sorry." Usagi said after a moment of silence.

This awoke Leonardo out of his stupor, "What? No, I'm the one who's sorry. I shouldn't have been done that…I knew you had it under control."

But Usagi was shaking his head, a small smile spread across his face, "I've been alone for so long, I didn't think about you in that moment. I just acted as would have in the past."

"Basically, we're both sorry."

"Yes," there was another brief pause where they exchanged apologetic grins. Their argument was over, settled. Usagi looked away, staring ahead at the other wall across from them. "Who's Raphael?"

Leonardo thought for a moment, before asking his own question, "you remember when we left New York, and you asked me what I could remember?"

Usagi thought about it, and nodded. "You said you had an argument, and shortly after you were attacked. But you never told what it was about."

"It was between me, and I think my brother. Our father died recently, and it was over his death."

"A brother?"

"Yeah, Raphael. But I think…no, I know I have two other brothers. Donatello, and Michelangelo." Leonardo bit his lip, "but over the past few months, that argument that had cling to as the only memory I had, started to feel fake. Like it didn't happen."

Usagi wanted to ask why didn't Leonardo tell him about any of this before, when Usagi had shared so much about his past, but he didn't. It wasn't a fair question. Leonardo, up until now, couldn't remember anything from his past, and if the only memory he did have seemed false, Usagi couldn't blame him in not wanting to talk about it. Instead, Usagi asked, "what now?"

"I just want to go home."

"To New York?"

"No, I…" Leonardo buried his head in his hands. He let out a sigh, and looked back at Usagi, "This is selfish, but I can't face them. Not now. Soon, but not now. I want to go back to the _van_." Leonardo emphasized that last word.

Usagi nodded. "Alright. We will go back to New York, not now, but soon." Usagi reached out, and grabbed Leonardo's hand. He knew this wasn't healthy, and he suspected that Leonardo knew it too, but Usagi wasn't going to push him.

"Thank you," Leonardo mumbled out. He flicked his tongue out, licking his lips. "Back in the park, before all that happen, I remember being in a middle of a kiss."

Usagi gave the turtle a raised brow, but didn't comment. Usagi knew that Leonardo was looking for a distraction, and he knew he was going to cave in and be that distraction.

 **5\. Bubbling Over**

It was several weeks since that fateful day in the park. It was now mid-October, and the onslaught of memories were relentless. As he gained more memories, the distance between him and New York grew; and so did the guilt. Still, he could not bring himself to go back home. Not until he could remember what happened to Master Splinter. Leo had the faintest feeling, that if he returned, his father was not going to be there, and his brothers will be looking to him for questions.  
In the meantime, he would live with the guilt.

And Usagi made it bearable. More than bearable

"How do you like your new cell-phone, Leonardo?"

 _Mostly_ bearable.

"It's great," and it was, "but, I'm still not happy about how we got it."

From where Leo was laying, he couldn't see Usagi's expression, but he'd hazard to guess that his boyfriend was rolling his eyes. "I don't know how many times I have to tell you; I didn't steal the phone."

The new sleek cell-phone wasn't stolen. On the contrary, Usagi had bought it. The money? Well, in Leo's opinion, that was stolen and wanted no part of spending it. Usagi disagreed.

"Yeah, I know, but you said it was drug money."

"Exactly. It _was_ drug money. Now, it's money for gas, food, water, and clothes."

Leonardo sat up from his position, and gave the rabbit a half glare, which Usagi returned. Up until now, Leo had been laying on his shell on the van's bed. Leo had remembered an old email that Donatello had forced him to get when they were thirteen. He was using a stylus to scroll through his contacts list. Usagi had been resting his head on Leo's chest. The movement forced Usagi to sit up too.

"It wasn't ours."

"I can't believe I actually wanted you to disagree with me," Usagi muttered. "Look, Leonardo, my sweet, innocent green-bean, the drug dealer was criminal. He was a danger to society. We removed him off the streets of that tiny little town; we did society a favor. We earned that money" his ears perked up, "and this new hoodie." The hoodie in question was dark blue, and far too large for Usagi.

Leo gave Usagi a flat stare. "You're deplorable, and you lack any sort of honor," there was a beat, "did you just call me 'sweet, innocent green-bean'?"

"Says the _ninja_." Again, way too chipper.

Leo scowled. "Says the ninja to the dishonorable _ronin_."

That did it. Usagi's ears dropped with irritation. "Yes the ronin. The ronin who's better at being a ninja then the ninja." Usagi meant it as insult, who over the past few weeks, found out how much Leonardo embraced his ninja training. But Leonardo couldn't help to agree. Usagi _was_ a good ninja. Despite being on the run, Usagi could disguise himself well enough that he had no problem walking into a Wal-Mart and shopping for an hour.

"Anyway," Leonardo decided to change the subject, "I… set up an email on my phone. My old email."

"Oh?" Usagi's ears perked up again.

"Yeah…I think…I don't know what to think."

There was a pause, and then "I think you should email one of them. Your brothers, I mean."

Leonardo looked down at the phone, "I know, I know. I know I should. But I can't. Not yet."

Usagi let out a sigh. "I've been enabling this for too long, you not wanting to go back home. And if you don't want to return home, yet, that's fine. But you have a way to contact them now." Usagi reached for Leo's face, and cupped his cheek, forcing Leo to look at him. "You need to get a hold of them, Leonardo."

Leonardo's gaze looked back down. The contacts list was still open, and the first name at the top belonged to April O'Neil.

 **6\. P.S. My number is**

 _Dear, April O'Neil,_

How are you? I am doing fine myself. Except I have been suffering from amnesia for the past several months, and only up until recently, I had no memories of who I

Leonardo hit the back space, and started over. Again

 _Dear, April,_

 _I am deeply sorry for being gone for so long, I_

Leonardo hit the back space, and started over. Again

 _April,_

 _Before you panic, and ask Donnie to delete my account because you think someone hacked it, I am Leonardo. I know I have been gone since February and or March, and you are probably wondering why haven't gotten a hold of anyone yet._

 _I have been suffering from amnesia for the past several months. Just recently I had started getting back my_

Leonardo hit the back space, and started over. Again

 _April,_

 _I've been trying to write this letter for the past hour. I don't know what to say in it, how to explain everything down in words._

 _I want to talk to you. I think it will be better that way if explain to you what's been going on, where I've been, what happen to me, and why I didn't return home right away verbally over the phone._


	10. Chapter 10

AN: So a bit of a heads up. I'm going to be starting school next week, and updates are going to be slow. However, with that said, I should be finish with this story in mid-October. I will also be editing some of the earlier chapters to make the story more cohesive.

* * *

 _10\. One the other end_

 ** _November 30_ _th_ _, 2019. 3:41 am_**

 _Bang!_

April O'Neil jolted awake to loud banging that resonated from her living room. She immediately jumped out of bed, grabbed the metal bat that set next her night stand, and quietly made her way through the only hallway of her apartment.

 _Bang! Bang! Bang!_

April jumped at the noise. She gripped the bat tighter.

She peered around the corner into her living room, the sound coming from the large window that was on the far wall. She saw the familiar shadow of Donatello pacing back and forth on her fire-escape.

She turned toward the right and saw it was nearly four in the morning.

The feelings of concern and fear for her safety was soon replaced with dread. Why was Donnie banging on her window so damn early in the morning? April shook her head, and the growing panic that was bubbling inside her, and strode over to the window to let the turtle in.

Donnie stopped pacing the second he saw her. April barely got the window open, when he swiftly made it into the room, and pulled her into a tight hug.

He pulled her away from him at arm's length and looked her over. Suddenly, she was acutely aware that she was in nothing but a baggy t-shirt that barely covered her underwear. She folded her arms across her chest. But the look in his eyes told her that he was checking to see if she was hurt. "Donnie? What's going on?"

He didn't answer, instead asked, "why didn't you answer your phone?'

She hugged her arms across her chest, the early winter air caused her to shiver. "I was asleep. Donnie, tell me what's going on."

He ran his hand over his head, and resumed his pacing, "Master Splinter, and Leo are missing. We've been looking for them for nearly two hours now, we can't find a single trace of either of them. Mike, and Raph are still looking. I tried calling you, but when you didn't answer I got worried that something happened, that's when I decided to come over."

April's face twisted into confusion; he was going way too fast for her too follow, "wait, Don, slow down, and start from beginning. What do you mean, 'Master Splinter, and Leo are missing'?"

Donnie took a long breath, before explaining. "Last night, there was this outdoors Japanese festival thing. I don't know what it was. All I know is that there was going to be a kabuki play, or something, and Master Splinter really likes that stuff. And so does Leo, and he's not just going to let our elderly father go by himself, so he took Dad. But they didn't come back home last night." Donnie started to walk back and forth at a faster pace.

"Donnie," April reached up and grabbed his arm to get him to stop, "sweetie, you to sit down. Let me get dress, and we will head out and start looking again. Alright?" She rubbed his forearm, "we'll find them, Donnie."

He just nodded dumbly, but it was clear to April that Donnie didn't believe they would.

 _December 10_ _th_ _, 2019. Midnight._

Her job as chief of police came first. That's what she told her self when Leonardo and his father disappeared over a week ago. She could not just drop everything to help search for them. She wanted to, but she had other responsibilities.

But, Rebecca Vincent soon found herself spending not only her free times, but also hours on the job, looking for any information on the two mutants.

Tonight was not the exception. She had returned to where the small Japanese festival was held. It was hosted in Central Park, and it lasted for only two days. Any signs of the festival and the kabuki performers were long gong now.

The early snow that fell around the time of the festival, had completely vanish. The snow had hindered their process on finding any clues, but she hoped now that snow had melted, she'd find something.

And she wasn't the only one out tonight.

All three of the Leonardo's brothers were tailing her.

Still, she moved quickly. Central Park was not a safe place to be at night, regardless who had her back or not.

When she finally reached the area, she looked around for any signs of another human before motioning them the coast was clear.

They all jumped down around her, barely making a sound in doing so.

Rebecca got a good look at them under the street light, and she saw the same look she had seen in multiple other families. She had dealt with many missing persons cases in her career, and she always hated to look in the family members of the missing person and have no answers.

She cleared her throat, and look away. They didn't need her to talk to them as if they were just another victim's family. "As we know, April and Vern weren't able to find anything when they were here earlier. It's quite possible that they missed something as they had to work around civilians," she looked back at them, "Donatello, Michelangelo, I want you two search on the west side of the park. Any sign of trouble, you call in. Raphael, you're with me."

"Yo, Chief," Raphael questioned, "wouldn't we cover more if we split up?"

She was already shaking her head, "given the circumstances, I don't think that would be for the best."

 ** _January 21_ _st_ _, 2020._**

Casey Jones glanced at the rear-view mirror of his car. Shadow Jones was in the back seat, sound asleep. He hoped she stayed that way when stopped by the lair before heading to his new apartment.

It had been a difficult past two months. Raphael called him early December about what happened to Master Splinter and Leonardo. Casey desperately wanted to join in the search, but he found a life in Colorado. His wife, Gabrielle, was seven months pregnant. He couldn't just leave her.

Raph said he understood.

But then, two days later after that call, Gabrielle was in a car accident.

Casey looked up again and Shadow's reflection. He gripped his steering wheel. She already looked so much like her mother.

 ** _February, 29_ _th_ _, 2020. Early morning_**

Rebecca spotted Vern flashing his key to the city to several officers to let him, April, and to her displeasure, Casey Jones, behind the yellow tape. She stalked over to three, more furious at her own officers that at them.

"This is a crime scene. You three are civilians. You're not allowed to be here."

Vern put his hands up, "now, Chief, we're here as representatives for a certain green team."

She ignored Vern and for that matter, Jones, and focused on O'Neil. "How did they find out about this so soon?"

April shrugged, "The six of us we're going to investigate the Purple Dragons when we heard about the police scanner."

"So, we figured, why not come by and see what's goin' on." Jones finished.

Rebecca turned towards him, "don't you have a daughter to take care of?"

"My ma got her for the night. 'Sides, the boys are already inside."

Rebecca sighed, "of course they are." She yelled out the lieutenant on scene, "Longer, clear out the building."

Officer Longer, being aware of the turtles and who their companions were, followed orders without question.

The building was a series of hallways, and caged up rooms.

"What the hell is this place?" Vern asked.

"It's abandoned asylum. Most people avoid this place, except for teenagers and young adults. That's who called in. A young woman and her friends were about to explore the place before they heard gunfire. They ran back to her house, which is an hour away, before calling the police." Rebecca did not hide her annoyance, "by the time anyone reached here, everything was quiet." Rebecca answered. She led them to a large double door, before she stopped. April could already smell the blood just from the other side. April returned her attention to Rebecca when she started talking again. "Now, look, I'm going to play this off as you three are my consultants. That's it. You can't touch anything in there or else. Understood?"

"Yeah, yeah, understood, Chief. Now can we go in?"

Rebecca rolled her eyes, but pushed opened the doors anyway.

The repugnant smell grew stronger the second they walked into the long hallway. Bodies littered the floor, nothing more than just giant blood-covered lumps.

"I'm going to be sick," April muttered.

"If you're going to be sick, go back outside, I can't have you contaminate the evidence. It's bad enough that you three are here." Rebecca chastised.

"Aw, but we just want to help."

The four humans jumped at the sound of Michelangelo's voice. He stood not two feet away from the group, and yet they did not notice him. He was leaning against the wall. He raised his hand, and gave a half smile, "yo."

"When did you get here?" Casey asked.

"Just now." Donnie answered. They snapped their attention toward where Donnie, and Raph were at. Raph was hunched over one of the many dead bodies on the ground, while Donnie stood above him. "You guys are just in time, I'm about to hack into the surveillance."

Mikey and the others joined his brothers. They avoided to step on any of the bodies. Most of the men on the ground were wearing military grade armor, and were holding weapons. There five people who were not. The four men, and one woman were in lab coats, and nice work clothes. They gave an impression of doctors. Casey was surprised to see one-way mirror cover most of the right wall.

"So, like, there's why more bodies than just in this hall. The way we came, there was trail leading right to here." Mikey said, taking Casey's shocked expression was because of the bodies on the floor.

"You guys have an idea who did this yet?" April asked as she slid right next to Donnie.

"A big fuckin animal," Raph answered, standing up.

Vern bent over the body Raph was just looking at, "really? You know, I spent four years in veterinary school before becoming a camera man."

"Good for you."

Vern ignored Raph's sarcasm as he bent over to get a closer look at the bite mark on the man's neck. His eyes widen. It took him seconds to recognize what animal could make such a mark. "A rodent." He whispered.

"A what?" Rebecca asked?

"A rodent," Vern said it much clearer now. He stood up, meeting everyone's gaze. "Not just any kind of rodent, but a _rat."_

"How do you know it was a rat?" Mikey asked.

Vern looked at all the three turtles, in disbelief, "how could _you_ not know? Your father is a giant rat. That right there," he pointed at the dead body, "could have only been done by a rodent. And there's only one rodent I know that could do this much damage."

Before anyone could reply, Donnie projected a screen on the wall across from them. "I got into the cameras. I've been fighting with another computer expert this whole time, I'm not sure how long we have." He said this as he pulled out a small device, and began typing away. He ignored the feed.

The footage was grainy, but it was clear enough that it was of this specific hallway. Three hours ago, the people in the lab coats, and those in the armor were standing where theirs bodies were now. The people in lab coats, most likely scientists, were looking at the one-way mirror.

While the video quality was bad, the audio was not.

" _Dr. Stevens, are you sure it was a good idea to give the subject an injection? We're about to transfer out."_ The sole female scientist questioned.

A man, Stevens, turned to face the woman, " _you know how long we've been waiting to test this serum?"_

" _Yes, but, what if something goes wrong?"_

" _And? We have another of these turtles back at the home base. He's expendable. If something does go wrong, then we can test it on Slash. And besides, even if I didn't think it was a good idea, Jei gave us his orders."_

"Did he just say turtle?" Mikey muttered. No one answered him.

 _"It's awaking up."_ Another one of the scientist exclaimed, grabbing the attention of everyone else.

Stevens clapped his hands together, before slipping his hand into his pocket, pulling out some sort of device. " _I want all of you to take notes. This is important."_ He put the device to his mouth and started speaking into it. " _This is Dr. Alex Stevens, and today is February, 29th, 2020. Today, we have administered serum-f39 too Subject A. If made correctly, the serum should produce intense hallucinations based on the subject's fears. As noted in the previous tests, Subject A is a male mutant turtle. It is six feet, and four inches tall. Its weight was clocked out around 255.7 lbs. Compared to the first mutant turtle we encountered, known as 'Slash', Subject A is remarkably more human. The exceptions, are of course, the subject's shell, plastron, skin, lack of ears, the number of fingers and toes—six fingers, including two deposable thumbs, and two toes on each foot—and genitalia—_

Raph drowned out whatever Stevens was going to say next, "What da fuck?" Raph turned toward Donnie, who was now staring at the video wide-eyed with fear, "they're talkin about Leo!" Raph gestured at the video, "That's Leo! He was here. They're both fuckin here! We need to—

He was cut off by Leo yelling in pain.

Everyone jumped at the sound.

"What are they doing to him?" Mikey cried out!

"Donnie, turn it off!" April clung to Donnie's arm.

He shook his head, "I can't. We need to know what happen here."

"The fuck we do. We need to be out there lookin for Dad and Leo! Not listenin them get tortured!"

"Raphael, you can't just go running out there without any information," Rebecca argued.

Raph whirled around at the police chief, pointing his finger in her face. "How the fuck is sittin here doin nothing gonna help us? Fuck this, I'm leavin!" Raph stormed out the hallway and down the other.

Casey followed. "You aint goin alone. I'm comin too."

"Go ahead and leave!" Don shouted after them, "maybe we can finally hear what else is going on," and returned his attention

Mikey looked between the doors Raph left behind, and Donnie. "Shouldn't we stop them."

Donnie snorted, but didn't reply.

Mikey wasn't sure what to do, so he returned his focus on the video, as did everyone else.

When they did so, Leo had started screaming again, but it was more hysterical this time.

"Is he hallucinating? That's what causing him to scream like that, isn't it?" Vern asked.

Donnie went back to typing on his small computer, "I don't know. I can't get pass their fire walls to access any information about these people or what they were planning. Whatever was going on here, was run by some—fuck!" He cut himself off, and started typing madly at the device in his hand.

"Donnie, what's going on?" April asked, in panicked voice, but she had a good idea what was happening. The video had just cut off, leaving nothing but total silence.

 _Early March, 2020_

Hun, leader of the Purple Dragons, declared Leonardo dead. He claimed he killed Leo.

It wasn't true, Raph told himself. Leo was alive, and Hun was full of shit. There was no proof that Leo, or Master Splinter were dead. And Hun wasn't good enough to kill either one of them. So, yeah, Hun was full of shit.

Still, when the PDs spent five days partying at some abandoned parking garage, Raph and Casey had no problem busting dragon skulls in.

 ** _June, 13_ _th_ _, 2020. One in the morning._**

Mikey sat over the edge of an apartment complex, staring down at the moving city below him.

He hadn't been in the lair in several days. None of them have. Raph and Donnie argued nonstop for the past months, that Raph left home to move in with Casey. Then Donnie packed up all his stuff, including his lab equipment, and moved into another spacious underground lair. It was nearer April's apartment.

That just left Mikey, and he lasted a week by himself before venturing up to the surface. He refused to see either of his brothers, especially Donnie.

He sighed.

"You're not going to jump, are you?"

Mikey turned around to see a young woman behind him. She looked to be in her early twenties. She had dark skin and eyes, and her black hair had streaks of purple in it. He noticed she had on Batman pajamas on, and in her hand was an unlit cigarette. What confused Mikey, was that she didn't look terrified of him, but instead looked concerned for him.

"Who are you?" He asked, ignoring her question.

"Angel Bridge." She answered without hesitation. "So aren't going to jump?"

Mikey looked back at the ground, then back at her, "no. Why would I do that."

She sighed in relief, "oh thank God!" She lit her cigarette and let out a long drag. When she was done, turned back to Mikey and gave him a big grin, "so, is this the part where I scream?"

Mikey's grin matched hers, "bruh, you'd done miss that part already."

 ** _October 17_ _th_ _, 2020. 2:03 pm_**

April O'Neil was at work when she received Leonardo's email.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11. Meditation

"Did that help at all?"

It had been several hours since Leonardo had sent that email to April, and Usagi knew the turtle was nervous. Usagi, who in the short time they have known each other, knew Leo well enough to know exactly what Leo needed to relax.

Mediation. In the back of Usagi's prevented little mind wished it was sex, but he kept those thoughts to himself.

Leonardo smiled at Usagi, "hardly. I'm sorry."

The two of them were sitting just outside their van. The sun had set a long time ago, and there was a slight breeze blowing through the warm southern air.

"You do not need to apologize, Leonardo."

Leo looked down at his lap and bit his bottom lip before he opened his mouth to say sorry again, but then closed it. When he did speak, his words were, "what if I don't hear from my friend, April?"

"Then you try again, and if it doesn't work, email your brothers. And if that doesn't work, we go to New York."

There was a moment of silence. Leo thought over Usagi's words, and then let out a sigh, "it was easier when I didn't have my memories."

Usagi turned his head to the side, "Leonardo—

He was cut off by the sound a loud buzz that came from the van.

They both sat up straight, and Usagi's ears stiffen and twitched.

"What is that?" Leo asked, panicked.

The rabbit relaxed, and said in the deadpanned tone, "that is your phone,"

"My…phone?" Then realization sat in. "My phone!"

At the same time, Usagi said, "yes your phone."

Leo leaped off the ground and rushed over to the van. The doors to the back of the van were wide open, and his phone was carelessly placed on edge.

He picked up, and fumbled with it, trying to turn the screen back on. An unknown number flashed across the dark screen. There was prickling sensation of familiarity. It was April.

"Leonardo, you're going to miss your call."

Leo glanced down at Usagi, but the rabbit's attention was on Leo's phone. He saw it before he could react. Usagi had his hands casually stuffed into his sweatpants' pockets, then in split second, he snatched the phone from Leo.

On instinct, Leo was able to grab Usagi's left wrist, but Usagi had proven to be far quicker. He had already answered the call. Leo's face furrowed into a frown.

"Hello?" Usagi easily pulled from Leo's grip. He stepped out of Leonardo's reach.

Leo strained to hear who was on the other side. It had to be April, but he couldn't imagine her voice. He could remember quite a bit from before March, before meeting Usagi, but there were certain aspects of his life his mind just couldn't place. April's voice, what she looked like, couldn't form in Leo's mind.

"He's right here."

Leonardo was pulled from his thoughts as Usagi got closer again. Usagi slipped the phone back into Leo's hands, and then gently touched Leo's shoulder, "I'll give you some privacy."

Leo watched Usagi walk off, way from the van and further into the open field, pulling out his own phone.

Leo looked at the small rectangle in his palms.

He knew April was on the other end, waiting for him to reply, and yet—there was this hesitation.

In the second that Usagi gave Leo the phone, and then walking off leaving Leo to fend off an assault of hundreds of thoughts.

Leonardo's world had been split in two eight months ago.

The world where he had spent months alone with Usagi, out in the wilderness, with the only responsibilities he had was to make sure neither one was hurt or outed. The world where every memory was crisp and clear and Leo could pull to the forefront of his mind without a headache. The world where Leo could only remember a brief, and distant conversation with someone, possibly a family member, about a father Leo had no recollection. The world where Leo woke up with only a name and the bitter feeling of rejection, only to found someone who cared for him and maybe, possibly loved him. Maybe. Hopefully.

And then there was the world before that, the one that was pushed into existence by a gun aimed at Usagi's head. This world, a world Leo slowly got back every day. Memories of three, annoying brothers, a loving, and caring father, a small group of friends, a larger group of enemies. This world, Leo knew, had responsibilities. That world had visible chunks were missing, and his head pounded each time he tried latching onto a memory.

And worse yet, his father, _his_ Master Splinter, was missing, or...and Leo had to tell his brothers that he failed to protect a member of their small family.

A selfish thought sprang forth, and Leonardo wished he could go back to the world that none of this existed. That he could back to just him, and Usagi, and the van.

" _Leo?"_

A distant call of a woman's voice cracked through Leo's thoughts. Her voiced was low, a whisper. And fragile, as if she was bound to shatter in millions of pieces. And it hurt Leo to hear this voice sound this way. It should be determined, calm, caring, not broken.

" _Leo?"_ This time the voice was louder.

Without thinking, Leo raised the phone, and replied back, "April."

There was brief pause of silence, then a small gasp on the other end.

" _It—it—it's you,"_ April's voice was shaking. Her breaths were shallow and rapid, and Leo was expecting any minute she would breakdown and he couldn't handle hearing April, _the hogosha,_ breaking down. "Oh, God, it's you. It's really you. You're alive. I can't believe this, I can't—

She choked, and let out a sob, and she broke down.

Leonardo sat down on the bed of the van, his eyes stung with tears. He covered his mouth, bit his bottom lip, all to prevent himself from joining her.

It took several moments for April to compose herself. When she did, her voice was hoarse, raspy, _"Leo? You still there."_

"Yeah," it was all he could say.

" _Good."_ Another pause, _"your letter said you would explain what happened…"_

"Right, I did say that." After that, Leonardo seemed to get his voice back, as the explanation rolled off his tongue. From how Usagi found him in the dumpster in early March, to waking up with no memories, to being nursed back to health by Usagi, where Leo has been this entire time, and what triggered to gain back some of his memories.

Leo left out his relationship with Usagi out of his story. It wasn't important.

April listened to Leo's story in silence, and only spoke when he was finished. " _I think I can fill in some blanks for you. Not a whole lot because,"_ she stopped for a moment. Again. _"Look, Leo, I'm not sure I should tell you this. It could do more damage."_

Leo thought for a brief moment, thinking over what she said. "April, please don't hold back. If you know anything, I need to know. It might help me remember what happened to me."

" _I—no, I'm sorry, Leo. I don't have any medical knowledge. I don't want to cause you any harm by opening my big mouth,"_ April sighed. _"I shouldn't have said anything."_

"No, no, I guess you're right. I suppose I can wait until I talk to Donnie."

" _Donnie,"_ April said his brother's name under her breath. _"You need to call them, Leo; they need to know before you come back home."_

Leo shook his head even though he knew April couldn't see him, "I can't talk to them over the phone." A part of him wanted to ask April to tell his brothers, but his bit down on those words.

" _Leo, they think you're dead. Everyone did. Not just us, but the Foot Clan, the Purple Dragons."_

Leo had been expecting that.

Well.

Sort of.

It was a shock to know the Foot Clan had been aware of his disappearance, but given how nervous he felt about the Purple Dragons when he first woke up, Leo thought it made sense they would know something about it.

" _Leo?"_

Leo bit his bottom lip for what felt like the hundredth time before answering, "Alright, give them this number, tell them what I told you. We can move on from there."

They talked a bit more, nothing too specific, Leo noticed. Maybe she was waiting until he could talk to his brothers.

Leo wasn't sure how long he talked with April, but at the end of it, when they said their goodbye's a clear image of a woman with dark brown hair, and matching brown eyes in a yellow leather jacket filled his mind.

* * *

AN: I want to apologize for not posting regularly and not updating this fic like I should have. I haven't abandoned the fic, and honestly, we got ten or so more chapters left. I have everything written out on paper, I just need to find time to type it, but rest assured this fic will be completed


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